Sunday, April 12

Off the top of my head I can count 6 things that I'm trying, fairly hard for, at this moment.
One is poisonous and a waste of my time.
The second is pointless and increasingly disappointing. What happened to all your potential, man! You used to be enough for me. Now every time we talk it's so bloody meh. You used to be cool.
The third is studying. I've finally started and it's going really slowly but I have hope. It's all about building momentum and, in fact, after posting this unnecessary post, whose sole purpose is just to make me feel better / less distracted, I'm going right back to my books.
The fourth is a lifelong battle, so it doesn't really count. There are just variations in the degree of attention I'm paying to this issue.
The fifth is me dealing with ALL my close friends in Delhi, who coincidentally are also all my girlfriends and all the people from school (minus one) who I'm still friends with, leaving. (I can't help the sentence structure. Yeah, I know it's all over the place. I'm naturally incoherent)I've known them all my life and I don't know who else I'll tell about the crooked penises :| They're all going away to study and clean up lakes and I'm going to be left here bloody alone, with no plans of going anywhere for a while, in a job I increasingly loathe.
Which brings me to the sixth. I'm not going anywhere. I don't like my job. I had plans but they seem a little unrealistic at the moment. The job won't bother me post my three year mark but my beautifully made plan, The Plan, is a little wobbly right now :| Plan B was getting married and chilling and traveling on the spouse's deniros. Which might need to be resorted to now.

I'm not delving deeper but this list, Internet, is just to show you that I am trying. So be nice to me, the next time you see me.

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