Tuesday, January 17

I feel rather mean. The externalities are gone, things have become super peachy. And I don't talk to people that I used to talk to all the time anymore. I don't reciprocate certain affections directed towards me. I live in my bubble, the bubble keeps me happy. I don't care about how things will go with certain people anymore, I don't care about their lives. I don't remember what it felt like anymore. I have no contact with the margin, with the once rather familiar sharp sense of Me.
I think about all of them, but I will not lie. I'm rather glad I don't feel that way anymore. If I had to revert, I could. I'm sure. I'm stronger and though I seem to be slowly losing touch with certain aspects, I can't get the glass out of my system.
I do feel more balanced though. I think I know more and I think more importantly, I need less. Knowledge is power. I can see events as a linear chain. There is underlying structure. I see the chain and I can see there is a bigger picture, and this is not it.
Most of all I'm happy.
I send love to the children.

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