If you hang your head that way
and look at it
and count time with your fingers
and run one rough finger over dry lips
and not know what to do with love
and always have cold hands
and sit very still for very long
and wait for fuck knows what
and think that it's been way too long
and want to wrap yourself around something tangible to ground you to reality
and smile more inwards than outwards
and have a best friend (who probably doesn't know their status of 'best friend') far far away
you will explode.